Love in the Fridge

refrigeratorLove, the healthy real kind, is quite similar to healthy real food.  Both nourish, bring a sense of fullness, often are very pleasurable, give energy, and empower with vitality and enhancing elements (for example vitamins : food, affirmations : love).  Love in the heart which is not demonstrated (given, shown, acted upon, etc.) is like food in a freezer that never gets thawed, cooked and served.  We can be glad that there is food in the freezer and love in the heart but neither are nourishing anyone while in storage.  The food we call love, just like the physical food, has to be gotten out of storage, warmed up and served to someone before it can be taken in and do its nurturing job.

One of the most often repeated sentences heard in counseling is something like “Dad (or sometimes Mom or someone else) never told me he loved me”.  The hurting patient might add things like, “I guess he did love me but he never said it, or acted like he loved me, or showed it any way that I could see directly”.  One of the happier things that’s fairly common in family therapy is when one of those dads, or family members simply says out loud to their child, or another family member, “I love you” for the first time.  Finally it’s like the food is out of the freezer, warmed up and put forth where it can do some good.

If you love someone show it, get good at all the major ways of demonstrating love, work to improve your love giving skills, and encourage others to do the same.  Don’t be one of the people who holds love in their heart, or their food in the freezer, until it’s too late or there’s no chance of it nourishing anyone.

♥ Love Success Questions
W
ill you metaphorically go down into your heart and grasp some of the love you have for someone in your life, and serve it up so it might nourish them in the next hour, day, week?  Who will it be?  Will you provide your love-food by way of love words, love touch, love expressions in your tone of voice or facial look, in love gifts, affirmations, or …?  Remember, love is a free gift one gives without expectation of return or even acceptance; the benefit to you is in the giving.  Hopefully your loved one will recognize your gift and be nourished by it.  Also will you give some of that love nourishment to yourself today by way of forgiveness, or patience, or positive self talk, …?


Image credits: The Dood’s fridge” image by Flickr user Andrew Butts .

 

Dr. J. Richard Cookerly

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